


Alone On This Dark and Painful Night

by flipflop_diva



Category: Chicago PD (TV)
Genre: Angst, Drinking to Cope, During Canon, F/M, Female Friendship, Friendship, Missing in Action, Team Feels
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-24
Updated: 2016-12-24
Packaged: 2018-09-09 10:34:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,411
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8887582
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flipflop_diva/pseuds/flipflop_diva
Summary: The phone call came at two in the morning on a Wednesday night. Phone calls at that time were never good news.This was not good news.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [evening_spirit](https://archiveofourown.org/users/evening_spirit/gifts).



> Happy Yuletide, evening_spirit!

The phone call came at two in the morning on a Wednesday night, just three weeks after she had officially (finally) joined Intelligence. Kim felt like she had barely shut her eyes before she was opening them again, groaning in frustration.

She could feel the blood pounding in her temples as she cast a look at the offending object lying on the nightstand beside her bed. Maybe she shouldn’t have had so many beers after work with Erin, but she had needed it. She had needed, for once, to not feel things. To not feel anything. To just talk and drink and forget.

She was going to pay for this in the morning, though. She was going to pay for it right now maybe.

She contemplated just not answering the phone, just letting it ring and go to voicemail.

Intelligence was everything she had ever dreamed of, but it was also so much harder than she had imagined. She’d thought she and Adam had gotten to an acceptable level of friendship, but working with him every day, seeing him every day was entirely different. And with the holidays right around the corner, it was even harder.

She had wanted to be engaged for the holidays. Heck, she had wanted to have been married.

At least Erin could see she was struggling. At least Erin knew she could use a night out.

But maybe they should have done it a different day, one where the phone wouldn’t now be screaming in her ear. She really didn’t want to answer it, but it took less than half a ring for her to discard that thought. If someone was calling now, it was important. If someone was calling now, it was trouble.

She took another half a ring to try and pull herself together, to try and shake the sleep and the beginnings of the hangover away.

She picked up the phone to check who was calling. It was Erin.

It was definitely about work. It had to be. It’d been hours since they had left the bar. And, if the feeling in Kim’s gut was right, it definitely nothing good.

She hit answer.

“Burgess.” Her voice croaked slightly, remnants of sleep and alcohol. Fuck.

“Kim.” Erin’s voice was low, serious. Kim had heard her use that tone so, so many times. Instantly, she felt dinner starting to make its way back up her throat. “You’re going to want to come in for this.”

“What happened?”

“Adam’s missing.”

•••

“What do we know?” It was the first thing out of her mouth as she marched up the stairs, seeing everyone else gathered around the mark-up board. Her voice was steady, firm, almost like she was in charge.

She wasn’t. Obviously. But she couldn’t afford to lose control. If she lost control … well, she didn’t want to think about that because she knew if that happened, she might not ever get that control back.

It didn’t help, though, that the heads turning toward her looked empathetic, looked sympathetic.

Fuck. They were his friends, too. They were his friends first. They had known him longer. Just because one time, for a short time, she had thought they were going to have a future, it didn’t mean she had rights to him. They should have rights to him. They should.

But Voight was there, looking at her. And then Voight was talking. Saving her. Taking over.

She moved to stand next to Erin, tried to keep her professional face on. She had to keep her professional face on. She would fall apart otherwise.

“Antonio,” Voight said. Commanded really. “What do we have?”

Antonio stood up, an air of professionalism around him. He didn’t seem affected. Not more than usual. That was good. That was how she needed to be too.

“A few hours ago, at one twelve a.m., Ruzcez radio’d in about a potential robbery on West Marquette Road. Said he was going to take it. Called for backup. At one nineteen backup arrived, stormed the house, found it destroyed. No one was there. Not the suspects. Not Ruzcek.” Antonio paused here, took a breath. He didn’t look at anyone, at least not directly. Kim noticed that. Of course she did. She was watching him carefully the whole time.

“Mouse tracked his phone. We know Ruzcek went down Marquette, took a turn on to Aberdeen, then another turn on 66th to the park. That’s where the signal went dead, at one thirty-six a.m.” Another pause. “There’s been no trace since then.”

“Okay,” Voight said. “Then we work this like we work all our cases. Let’s start with the suspected robbers. They wanted something. Let’s find out who they are and what they wanted and go from there.”

Kevin raised his hand. Literally raised his hand like this was grade school. Kim almost wanted to scoff, except she knew she couldn’t. Any sound that came out of her mouth wasn’t going to be a scoff. It might very well be something she couldn’t control.

“Atwater,” Voight said.

“I thought we were under the police chief’s orders not to investigate?”

“We are,” Voight said. “But this is one of our own. We are not sitting on the sidelines if we can help. I don’t care what they say. And if any of you aren’t cool with that you can leave. … Anyone?”

No one moved.

“Good. Then get going.” He looked then at Kim. “Go with Erin,” he told her. “You can help that way.”

•••

She wasn’t sure this was helping the case, but it was helping her. Maybe. Or maybe it was just masking the pain. She wasn’t sure.

The area of the bar in front of them was littered with shot glasses. Hermann just kept pouring. He hadn’t charged them since Adam was taken. 

It had been four days. Four days of nothing but dead ends and false hope. Four days of learning about these suspected robbers who weren’t just robbers but professional assassins. Professional assassins who had been attempting something when Ruzek interrupted, alone and without backup, and had seen something. Something he shouldn’t have seen. Something he must have been able to help them with.

That was good. That was what Alvin said. They would have just killed him otherwise. But they took him for a reason. They wanted him alive. And if they wanted him alive, it gave them a chance — a good chance, Alvin kept saying — that they could find him.

Kim picked up another shot glass that had magically appeared full of vodka in front of her, tilted her head back, poured it down her throat. It didn’t even burn anymore. It used to make her gag, once upon a time, in another life when Adam was her fiancé, but not now. Now it was just a temporary relief as she waited. Waited for news, waited for hope, waited for what came next.

The what ifs were the hardest. They had broken up for a reason, but maybe if they hadn’t … but would that have changed this? Would that have made him react differently? Kim grabbed another shot glass, gestured at the empty ones to Hermann who was watching her and poured it back.

She didn’t need what ifs right now. She just needed vodka.

•••

The call came at four forty-seven in the morning. She was asleep on Erin’s couch. Passed out really. She hadn’t slept in twenty-seven days, not since the call from Erin. Now she just slid into unconsciousness, thanks to the aid of her new friend vodka.

But she wasn’t passed out enough that she couldn’t grab the phone. The name swam, a little blurry, in front of her. It was from Antonio. She answered it immediately.

“Antonio?” she breathed. “Antonio.”

“They found him. Kim, they found him.”

“Oh my God.” The world swam in front of her, maybe from the vodka or maybe from the emotions coursing through her body. But she had to ask, had to know. “Is he …?” She couldn’t even say it.

“He’s alive.”

Relief poured through Kim’s body. Tears sprang to her eyes.

“He’s in rough shape, but he’s alive. And Kim?” Antonio paused for a second. “He’s asking for you.”

“Tell him I’m on my way.”

Kim hung up the phone, tears already pouring down her cheeks but a smiling starting to grace her face.

He was alive, Adam was alive.

Nothing else mattered. Everything else they could deal with.

Adam was alive.

**Author's Note:**

> To evening_spirit, I really wanted to write you the Chicago PD fic of your dreams, but unfortunately, that didn't happen (I'm not so great with writing the male characters). So I tried my best to incorporate what you wanted with what I could do. I sincerely hope this in some small way was a little of what you were looking for.


End file.
